Da one n only 
biography written by Alan Walker haz juzt arrived in da mail whil i wuz practicin octz (da hot mailwomen asked for da sex). Diz fuckah is longer dan ziffro’s peniz.
I m randumly goin to read n annotate da whole sheeyat. Haz nybody else read it?
brb, i haff to prepare da cock for such a furious piece of literature.
step 1=scan
step 2= upload
step 3= post dat sheeyat here so we can leech
im afraid i dunt haff time to scann 3000 pages.
It takz me about 5 minutez to scan one.
If ud do ze math, it wuld take me about 250 hourz.
dat is like 11 dayz without sleepin.
I majorly reccomend diz gensui tho. In da firzt 50 pagez i haff found out dat:
-even vven he waz 58 he had to hide from da million ladiez who wanted da cock.
-his great-great-grandfater wuz randumly a peazant
-ven he waz 6 yerz old he waz nown to point at a portrait of da brotha on da wall ven ppl asked him wat he wanted to do wen he wuz older.
-he wuz trained in improvisation since he wuz little kid
dayum, u iz da awesome…gimme a link in amazon to da book, wuts the title?
speed up and get to the pianistic feats section and tell us wut he could do on da piano…
Diz be da first book: amazon.com/gp/product/080149 … e&n=283155
Dey r so big dey had to be split in 3.
Dey be majorly expensive cuz dey r accademic books.
I will keep dis thread updated wit wikid facts.
mo wikid factz:
Da piano:
-Ven he wuz 11, he wuld, at the end of all hsi concertz, improvize on a theme subimtted by teh audience
-By that age (11) he culd site read any sheeyat music ppl put on da forte. Back in tha dayz they alwayz had a piano in da sheeyat music store so ppl culd see wat da music wuz like, n wen lizst asked for somethin “very difficult n furious” da store owner thout he wuld shut him up by givin him da humml’s incredibly difficult concerto, but dis furious pimp sightread da whole thing perfectly Nywayz.
-for 2 monthz Czerny refused to haff him play anythin but technical excercises n other sheeyat. dis made da pimp furiouz n he wuz very bitter wit Czerny in da beginning.
Da CG
-Diz fuckah blew up hiz house when he was 6 yearz old by throwing hiz dad’s bag of gunpowder in the fire while hiz parentz were away. Lukily he zurvived n got da beating of hiz life
-Czerny talkin about da first time he saw da pimp (age 9):
“He wuz a pale, funky lookin mofo who, whie unleashin on da 88, swayed bach n forth like he wuz drunk, n i seriouly thought he would fall off at any second” Hhahahahaha, WTF??? 
-One day when he wuz 11 he plaid for dis rich ass aristocratic cock, n da cock waz so imprezzed he told Liszt dat he culd ask for any present. Da pimp, in a calssic CG move, pointed at a very expensive piece of art on da wall, it wuz a puppet, n yelled “THAT CLOWN!”
hahahahahaha
fuckkkkk,
REZPEC da pimp CG.
dis iz news and CG pu tegthah…
respec 